Registered: Mar 2004
Re: B4 I wasn't sure… Now I'm confused lol
Originally posted by snowgo
I changed a lot, like I said once, in another thread, but it got deleted when they changed the forum ;( fortunately I still have it so if anyone is interested… just ask ;D
Well… Last year, to be accepted in the group, I was pretending all the time, pretending to be someone it wasn't me. P!nk made me understand that »EVERY SECOND YOU SPEND TRYING TO BE SOMEONE ELSE, IT'S A LOST SECOND, BECAUSE YOU'LL NEVER GET TO YOU«. That's kind of my motto, I love her for saying that….
I knew what was right and what was wrong, but I just didn't have the »bravery/power« to show it… haha ex: I was always shy, didn't want to sing lol.. I had 7 years of music school with the highest mark, even from singing.. I’s just that I always thought “What are the others thing blahblahblah…” The last day the teacher called me to sing something , I got up, went there and sang.. Im more “***k lol.. It’s my life, I cant live it thinking always about the others lol” Just at home I actually realized that I sang a whole song in front of my class like nothing lol XD
But after signing here on PP; and seeing how many open-minded people are here, and that noone is afraid to speak their mind, and example? GOSH, I NEVER THOUGHT THERE WOULD BE SO MANY HOMOSEXUAL OR BI PEOPLE ON HER FORUM, and the most beautiful thing it's that no one is afraid to show it… I was sooo happy when I got it…. But… I'm starting to write a thread per day.. and maybe someone of you is starting to wonder… why?? I'll tell you…
Because Slovenia, unfortunately, it's full of »close«minded people, they just hate everything that's different… (If I speak in Italian in my city, everyone turns to look at me, once I made a blog in Italian, and everyone was like .. dude, here's Slovenia! But gosh, it's a bilingual territory… accept it! Once I was walking to the sport center and talking in Italian with my friends, and there were some boys and they said like »Heyy look those Italian girls« and I said to them in Slovenian »***k you *** hole!« haha XD), they don't accept other nationalities, GAYS OR LESBIANS, they just look at them as if they're form Mars and I soooooooo hate it grrrrr… I asked my friends why everyone someone says the work homosexuality they laugh, they said because it's funny hahaha, but maybe for you i't normal??? YES, IT IS!!!!!
We know about a pedophile teacher, and a gay one… And the GAY one, who is a fantastic person, I personally know him, made more scandal here, form the pedophile one !! I can't get it… Everyone talks about the gay one, but no one cares about the other …
Oh yeah.. » days ago we had a lesson with another professor, a new one… Who is probably gay. He Was awesome, the way he explained things etc… and I liked him… and at the end of the lesson I told »Well he was good, I learned any things today«.. and the others were like »no way. I don't want a gay as a teacher, I'd prefer to die!«…
So what? GAY means WITH WHO YOU GO TO BED! Is this our business? NO! A gay can perfectly be more intelligent, good, a better person that an etero.. So it has no sense to judge someone from their sexuality… But if I try to talk like this in my school, they’d just laugh a lot and say I’m stupid.. I don’t wanna spend my energy on that lolI hate it here, hate it with passion, I wanna hurt it XD…
And I feel strange… I know I'm right, but I'M THE DIFFERENT ONE…
And sometimes I don't even know who I am…. And for the first time in my life, I found 2 girl in my school that I get along with and have my same ideas, and it feels strange. I ?m all the time with them now… And.. *confused*…
But I know better than them XD
“life is all an adventure, we have to live it to the fullest, treasuring every moment”
I am at the moment waiting for my owen to heat up so I'll just bump a short message here, after reading your post. I could write so much more than this but anyhow..
It's so amazing to read stories like this, just the way people realize some things. It proves how different we are.
You are special. And that is what people are AFRAID of being. You actually take TIME to think about these things while it is a FEAR to others. You keep on being who you are, cause it's obvious you've found yourself among the rest. Be strong and keep it real. You want Freedom, you'll get it. Let them waste theirs..
And about the GAY thing, it's not really about who you go to bed with, it's about living without barriers and letting yourself fall for a person, not a sex.
Off to cook! Take care. x
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